I just came back from having my mind blown at the Wonder Woman movie. I had a fandango ticket code I needed to use up this week. So I decided to go see Wonder Woman tonight. Thank goodness too. I needed to take myself on a romantic date after the day I had. Miss SassyPants traded in her cute, jestful sass for some defiant, disrespectful sass. Let's just say, I had had enough of it.
Some of the attitude did correspond with her Sensory Processing Disorder. For the most part, she is considered hyper-sensitive. She craves stimulation of movement, high energy, unfocused, easily distracted, touches roughly, talks loudly, food texture issues, being touched issues, social interaction issues, sensitive hearing, and horrible sense of self awareness in her surroundings (standing in the way or too close). She is hypo-sensitive in being overly clumsy and slow to realize injury pain. All of these senses are effected by different stimuli. When she isn't able to release pent up energy, she quickly becomes overstimulated and responds by being hyper active. She physically cannot sit still. Before she knows it, she"s jumping on the couch, off the couch, climbing furniture, running everywhere, and knocking into things and people in her path. Her body tells her to seek that stimulation to calm her overactive brain. As you can imagine, a high alert sensory day can be, and is, overwhelming for both of us. I spend most of my day getting on to her for breaking the house rules. I also have found there is a correlation between her sugar intake and easy overstimulation, which is why I watch her sugar consumption. Admittedly, I haven't been the best at that lately and allow her to over indulge. All of it accumulates into her being incredibly impulsive and unfocused. Every single disagreement becomes a ticking time bomb for a sensory meltdown. Once she has one, many follow through out the day. The morning started off rough because she didn't want to change from her pjs into regular clothes. Next was the physical fighting me while I tried to wash and warm compress her eyes. (Something we do twice a day and have been doing it for months now to prevent stys.) It was raining this morning, so I couldn't run her to the park for some physical activity. The sensory overload grew and grew. By 9 am, I had taken all of her most prized toys from her room, given her several time outs, and made her go lay in bed for an hour to calm down. During that hour, I did some old school Denise Austin Pilates DVD for exercise and to calm down. My anxiety and depression was on high alert. Hoping she had changed her attitude for the positive, I allowed her to come out of her room. Unfortunately, she was even more wound up than before. Finally, we made it to lunch and nap time. I had already lost my cool with her once for jumping on the couch and loving too roughly with her brother. (Seriously, she smothers him with hugs and kisses, when he tries to fend her off, she latches on even tighter, and that makes him cry out.) After lunch, she proceeds to go upstairs and play with her train set, waking her brother. She knows she is supposed to get ready for nap, not play with toys. By this time, I'm a ticking time bomb of emotions. I explained to her, yet again, not to get out of bed unless it was to go potty, then get right back in bed. Lately she's been getting out of bed and playing in her room or in her bathroom, which leaves her tired and cranky. I heard her get up several times and take longer than usual getting back into bed. Finally with 30 minutes left in nap time, I hear her banging around. Obviously, out of her bed and playing; which wakes her brother. At this point, I am so frazzled and lost for words at her behavior. Besides spanking her, I've taken every single thing away from her and put her in timeout numerous times; nothing is phasing her. And that is a sensory meltdown, one that escalates all day long, sometimes for days. Embarrassingly, I didn't keep my composure and ended up yelling at her to stop behaving this way, trying to snap her out of this meltdown. At the end of the day, it makes me feel like the world's worst mom to lose my composure.
On top of all of that, Little Brother, whom I call Mr. HappyPants now, is teething. He has a horrible diaper rash going on too. So, he isn't as happy as normal. He did watch me do the Yoga video and found it comical. As with any crawling 10 month old, he is into everything. When SP is acting up, it takes away from me being able to watch him. Before I know it, he is taking logs out of the fireplace, unplugging lamps, yanking on blinds, and pulling the oven drawer out. All in the blink of an eye. Who would have though someone so chunky could crawl so fast.
I've personally been struggling with PPD/A a little more this week. Therapy was intense and had me reflect on emotions that I had otherwise suppressed enough to function. Basically, it was like ripping off a scab to a healing wound. With SP's behavior, my heighten PPD/A, and HP's exploring adventures; I had a rough day. When Hubby came home, I couldn't leave for the theaters fast enough.

And my final mom meme:

And that's why I took myself on a date tonight. The movie was awesome. I ate my weight in buttery popcorn and had an icee coke all to myself. Tomorrow is a new day.

Changing plans

                                                                                                            Plans. They change. And that’s frustrating. 

It’s also the reason why I didn’t publish a post last night. I try to plan ahead. Well, no, let me rephrase that inaccurate statement. I plan ahead. So, if I know I have a schedule conflict on my blog night, I plan ahead, and pre-write my blog post. Of course, I have technology fails that keep said posts from being published. (Which by the way, I found where my drafts were being saved on my IPad. Hopefully I can figure out the scheduled publish time feature.) Anyway, I was supposed to have a therapy appointment on Monday evening. I had all of my “ducks” in order; as far as childcare, meal prep, and all that jazz. My therapist had to cancel, but wanted to re-schedule within a couple of days. Which brings me to my PSA: Not all stay-at-home moms have a wide open calendar of nothingness!!

Seriously, folks! Now, I will say my therapist had a very legitimate excuse to cancelling the appointment. And I was able to re-schedule for last night. But geez!! It was a source of stress and anxiety getting that done. She only had two evenings available, Tuesday and Wednesday. Tuesday just cannot accept anymore plans. It is my busiest day of the week and a day where my daughter HAS to have a nap in order to be focused in gymnastics. Because traffic is terrible where gymnastics is located, it takes me up to 45-60 minutes to get home. This week, there were 4 accidents, on the way I needed to go home. Three of them on the interstate, 1 on an alternate route I could’ve taken, and one route is just not an option due to on going construction. So, that left me (and a ton of other people) to overflow one route. (Spoiler alert! People drive with their heads up their butts, so there was an accident there too.) I was left with scheduling over my blog night. I also had to reschedule the babysitter, my husband’s schedule, and re-prep all the prepping I did for Monday. 

Unfortunately, I just do not handle that well. I easily become overwhelmed and flustered. It’s an involuntary response too. I want so badly to be like, “Hey, no problem. I’ll figure it out.” However, my mind goes nuts. “What?! How dare you cancel on me last second and want me to reschedule so quickly! I have to do all of this rearranging on top of my normal duties! This is insane! I can’t do it! Shut down mode….hysterically cry!” 

Guess what…that is frustrating too! I was able to get everything worked out. In hindsight, it wasn’t that big of an adjustment, other than not being able to blog. Yet, it still bothers me not to blog. Since I am blogging tonight, I won’t be blogging tomorrow. 

Let’s go back to my PSA. I’ve had people cancel on me at the last second, wanting to push the plans a day or two, as if it isn’t an inconvenience at all. When I’ve responded “No, I’ll have to wait until next week.” I’ve actually been asked, “Why? You’re a SAHM. It’s not like you do anything.”

Uhhhh, excuse me? I get the feeling from multiple experiences that this seems to be the general consensus.

My entire week is planned out, every week. When I do have “rest” days at home, I’m still cleaning something that has been neglected. Take today for example. I didn’t leave the house. But I folded, hung, and sorted laundry. I emptied the dishwasher, just to fill it back up. I prepared 3 different breakfasts and lunches, and 2 different suppers. (I’m not able to just throw some food on a plate. For my son, I have to measure each food item, record protein levels for each item, prepare medical formula; all for one meal.) I had to stop during supper to feed the big guy. I entertained the kids while trimming bushes for the entire morning. While the kids were down for nap, I finished picking up the bush trimmings, did the laundry, worked on my blog, ate lunch, showered, and tidied up the bathroom. I woke the kids up, prepared snacks, and gathered all the trash. I threw in some more entertainment from mommy. Then, I had to begin supper. Depending on the day, I know I have bath night, blood test night, blog night, gymnastics night, and therapy night. Let’s throw in some pediatrician appointments, grocery shopping, pharmacy pick ups, birthday parties, play dates …you get the picture? I haven’t even touched on driving my daughter back and forth to camps or school. I try to fit in morning workouts to keep my sanity. That’s some “me” time. I wake up at 5 AM, just to have a little time to myself to read, watch a show, or play catch up after someone cancelled plans with me. 

So, yeah, I get annoyed when people suggest that I, as a SAHM, don’t do anything. Or expect me to immediately accommodate them after they cancelled plans. PUH-Lease! No can do! 

It’s just something to think twice about. 

Last weekend was busy with a birthday party and a hair appointment for me. My daughter, SP, had a friend turning 4. The party was at this neat place that had multi level climbing areas, tubes, slides, and a ball pit. She had two Disney Princesses there, Ariel and Elsa. (No so funny, Cinderella was a no show to the birthday ball.) Ariel couldn’t get her music to play to sing “Apart of Your World”. Well, leave it up to me to save the moment because I have almost every Disney Princess song (up to Princess Tiana…sorry Merida and Elsa) on my phone. I can also sing the “Apart of Your World” in its entirety, without music. The Little Mermaid is my favorite, with Beauty and the Beast at a close second. SP had a blast and has another party to attend to this weekend. Because my weekends are so busy, its another reason why I try to keep my plans intact.

After I publish this blog, I get to make plans on my son’s first birthday…coming up on TWO months. Where has this year gone?! 

Fit Friday’s Recipes!

Happy Friday, y’all! I always have a sense of accomplishment when I’ve survived until Friday. I have no idea why, I just do. This weekend I have a much needed hair appointment with my amazing hair guru. Most of the time my hair is in a bun, unwashed or if washed, air dried with curls. I rarely take the time to blow dry and style it. He says that’s why it is so healthy. Miss SassyPants also has a birthday party to attend. She is beyond excited to celebrate with her friend. Hubby will have the ultimate “dad duty” managing both kids while there, because I can only stay an hour. Hopefully we can work in some pool time too. Now, onto my first favorite F word…food.

Yay! Finally, the Asian inspired healthy recipes I’ve been promising for two weeks now! [Sorry about that!] My first recipe is a play on Kung Pao Chicken by Fit Foodie Finds. It can be adapted to the Paleo diet if you swap traditional soy sauce with coconut aminos. I used half Bragg Liquid Aminos and low sodium soy sauce. Because I make enough for leftovers or indivdual freezer meals, I use larger amounts of the ingredients. Also, I never follow a recipe exactly. I make everything to accommodate my tastebuds and health choices.

What You’ll Need: 1 package of ~ 3 large chicken breasts, sliced thinly/ ~ 2 TBS of minced garlic (I love garlic!)/ 1 tsp of coconut oil/ 1 TBS sesame oil/ 1-1.5 # of green beans, fresh or frozen/ 2 TBS soy sauce or amino mix/ 1/2 TBS chili paste (or if you like spicy: 1 TBS Sriacha & 1TBS chili paste!)/ ~ 1 TBS of honey/ a dash of salt or pepper (I think the soy sauce adds enough salt)/ 1 tsp of toasted sesame seeds/ Optional: add toasted peanuts or cashews (I didn’t)

What You’ll Do: 1) Prepare chicken my slicing and peppering, set aside. Prep green beans by cutting off the ends (& chopping into bite sized length, if you like), set aside. Prepare stir fry sauce by combining: aminos/soy sauce, chili paste/sriacha, & honey to sit aside. 2) In a wok or large pan (I used cast iron.), heat coconut oil on med-high heat, add 1 TBS of garlic to brown. (Inhale the sautéing garlic smell!) 3) Add chicken & cook for ~ 5 minutes or until partially cooked, then removed from pan. 4) In the same pan, add 1 TBS Sesame oil & 1 TBS garlic, turn the heat up to a low high (or # 8, if your stove top is numbered), add the green beans and sauté for ~ 7 minutes until softening. 5) Add the chicken back in and cook for 5-7 more minutes, until the chicken is cooked through. 6) Add the stir fry sauce in, reduce the heat to low/low medium and simmer for 5-8 minutes. 7) Remove pan from heat and add your toasted sesame seeds and optional peanuts/cashews, allow to sit for ~ 3 minutes for the sauce to thicken. 8) Then, enjoy!

Along with this recipe, I added my adaptation of Damn Delicious’s Asian Roasted Carrots & Brocolli. I found the amount of sesame oil and olive oil to be way too much (& high in fats!) So, I omitted the olive oil, for the exception to lightly coat my baking sheet. I also reduced the amount of sesame oil from 2 tsp to 1tsp. If I have extra veggies, like zucchini, squash, or onion…I’ll add those to the carrots after ~ 15 minutes of baking, then the broccoli later.

What You’ll Need: 1# baby peeled carrots (or regular peeled and small-medium chopped carrots)/ 1# brocolli florets (I buy an entire brocolli, chop the head into florets, and peel and chop the stem too)/ 3 TBS of soy sauce or aminos/soy sauce mixture/ 1 TBS Honey or Brown Sugar/ 1 tsp sesame oil/ 1 tsp rice vinegar/ Optional add of 1 tsp sriacha/ 2 TBS minced garlic/ Optional 1 tsp toasted sesame seeds

What You’ll Do: 1) Preheat oven to 425 degrees F. Prep baking pan. 2) Whisk together the soy sauce mix/ honey or brown sugar/ sesame oil/ rice vinegar/ & optional siracha in a small bowl, set aside. 3) In a single layer, place carrots on baking pan and toss on pan to coat in olive oil, sprinkle with some minced garlic. 4) Bake in oven for ~ 20-25 minutes. Then, mix in the broccoli with 7-10 minutes of baking time to go. 5) When veggies are tender enough to your liking, remove and toss with sauce mixture. Allow the veggies to sit in the sauce for a few minutes and sprinkle your optional sesame seeds on there. Voila! (Last time, I poured the soy sauce mixture in with the brocoli for the last few minutes of cooking and liked it better! It made the sauce cook to the veggies some.)

My last Asian inspired recipe is a play on egg rolls. I love a fried egg roll! But goodness, they are high in carbs and fats! So, this is adapted from Happy Money Saver. I edited the recipe to healthier standards, omitted the chicken and water chestnuts, and substituted broccoli sprouts for bean sprouts. You can keep those, but I dislike water chestnuts, couldn’t find fresh bean sprouts, and prefer vegetable egg rolls with a meal.

What You’ll Need: 2 cups shredded cabbage/ 1 cup shredded or diced carrots/ 2 sliced green onions/ 1 tsp minced garlic/ ~ 3 TBS broccoli sprouts/ 1.5 TBS coconut oil (for sautéing)/ ~16 wonton or egg roll wrappers/ 4 tsp cornstarch/ 1 TBS water/ 1 TBS soy sauce/ 1 TBS rice vinegar/ 1 tsp. Sesame oil/ 1/4 tsp ground ginger/ 1 beaten egg white

What You’ll Do: 1) Preheat oven to 400 degrees F and lightly spray or rub baking pan with olive or coconut oil. 2) In a large pot, melt 1.5 TBS coconut oil to sauté cabbage, carrots, green onion, garlic, and broccoli sprouts until tender, ~ 5 minutes on med-high heat. 3) Whisk together cornstarch, water, soy sauce, sesame oil, rice vinegar, and ginger. 4) Add mixture to veggies and cook for a couple more minutes. 5) Remove from heat and allow to cool until you can easily handle veggies. 6) Open egg roll wrappers (keep covered with a damp towel, so they will not dry out!), work with wrapper in a diamond shape towards you on a cutting board or counter. 7) Fill with ~ 1/3 cup veggie mixture in middle of wrapper. To fold, meet side corners to middle, pull bottom corner over mixture, and roll. Leave top corner exposed to spread beaten egg white onto corner to seal close. 8) Repeat until veggie mixture is used. 9) Place egg rolls on baking pan(seam side down), lightly spray tops of egg rolls with olive oil or coconut oil, bake for 6 minutes, turn over, and bake for another 6 minutes. Now, you can either serve them with the meal OR if you have any extras, allow them to cool, and freeze them. Yes, they are freezer friendly! If you freeze them, once cool, flash freeze on pan for a couple of hours, then place in a Ziplock freezer bag, just re-heat by heating oven to 350 degrees F and bake for ~ 18-20 minutes. They are just as delicious! 

And those are my healthified Asian inspired recipes! It satisfies the Asian take out cravings, without ruining all of your hard work in the fitness deptartment. 

Have an awesome weekend, Loves!

July Vacation Fun

My goodness I can’t even tell you how many times I’ve started this post to be interrupted by the kiddos. For one thing, LB woke up about a week ago knowing how to crawl. I’m not talking about wobbly, really not going anywhere crawling either. He suddenly went into an all four position and took off. It’s been non-stop ever since. If he isn’t trying to crawl into the fireplace, rip down the blinds, scatter every single toy his sister owns, try to unplug every cord in the house, or trying to stand up; he is sleeping. He is on the go or sound asleep. Haha! His big sister, SP, is right there with him causing more chaos. If you want peace and quiet; don’t come here. 

I didn’t mean to skip the blog last week. We were on vacation in the mountains for the 4th of July. Although the cabin had wi-if, it was snail speed slow. It didn’t even reach the bottom floor of the cabin where our room was. I also didn’t have service. It was frustrating; but nice to unplug too. Overall the vacation was nice. The hubby and I went white water rafting. It had been raining off and on the previous week, so the rapids were higher than normal. It was an experience to experience, terrifying and fun. The hubby has wanted to white water raft for years. We had an action packed week, even with the kids. I also feel like I gained 20 pounds with all the food I ate. We went on a train ride, shopped, ate, and made sweet memories together. I’ve been watching my diet and running this week to combat last week’s damage. It was worth it though!

On Friday I will post my healthier Asian recipes (that I promised two weeks ago). I’ve been “cooking” up some more surprises and have a food review on a healthy pizza too. 

Technology Fail & Healthy Recipes

Computers and I are not friends. Last Wednesday I knew I wouldn’t be able to post on the blog due to a therapy appointment. I thought ahead, worked on a post Tuesday, saved it, and arranged for it to be posted on Wednesday. Well, that didn’t happen according to plan. Turns out, the post didn’t even save! So, here I am…redoing the post tonight. Lucky for you, I’m able to add a review of a new “fit” food product.

One of my favorite low carb items to use in my cooking is spaghetti squash. I like to roast them until tender and then fill them with healthy options. I use them to make lasagna boats, chicken parmigiana boats, taco boats, enchilada boats, and even a play on mac and cheese. 

Here, I did a play on lasagna. I sautéed red onions, added ground turkey, and seasoned it using FlavorGod’s Garlic Lovers. I stuffed all of it in a roasted spaghetti squash. I topped that with mozzarella cheese, a tomato sauce, and a sprinkle of parmesan cheese.  I stuck it in the oven for 15 minutes to melt the cheese.

I love pizza. But it is incredibly high in carbs and fat! An alternative I like to use is Joseph’s pita bread, turkey pepperoni, a simple pizza sauce, mozzarella cheese, and whatever healthy toppings you prefer. 

They make perfectly sized personal pizzas! My favorite way to make the pizza is a white cheese and spinach. If I’m splurging I will use ricotta cheese and mozzarella; but if I want to be extra healthy, I will use cottage cheese and mozzarella. Here are a few examples:

I like to make two at a time to have one for lunch. These pair well with a kale salad, by the way. I found another pizza alternative in the freezer aisle in Kroger yesterday. 

These are amazing! You can microwave them or bake in the oven for 30 minutes. I always prefer oven baked frozen pizzas to microwaved ones. Unfortunately, my oven didn’t need 30 minutes to heat it.

 It was over cooked a tad, but still tasted amazing. The serving size is a half of the pizza. You might think, “What?! That’s so small!” However, because the crust is actually ground chicken breast and parmesan cheese; it is high in protein. This also pairs perfectly with a kale salad. Here is the nutritional info in the back of the box. 

The price is rather steep, so I will only be purchasing if I’m having a huge pizza craving. 

Remember, eating healthy isn’t the only component to being healthy. You have to exercise too! I’ve been alternating between running and weight lifting. I love to run because it clears my head. The downside to running, is that you are dependent on the weather. It’s been raining here! So, when I can’t run; I’m in my garage lifting weights, using resistance bands, and doing cardio through a few HIIT moves. Burpees, mountain climbers, jumping jacks, etc. 

You also need to make room for treats, especially if you have kids. So when my daughter wants an ice cream sundae, I break out my Halo ice cream. If you haven’t tried it; do! It’s a life changer. I haven’t found a flavor I don’t like. My favorite is the chocolate chip cookie dough though. 

Next week I will have a total meal recipe for you. A healthier version of egg rolls, Asian veggies, and Kung Pao chicken for that Chinese takeout craving. Tomorrow I’m trying out a crustless veggie quiche. So far my quiche ideas have not turned out so well. Hopefully, this one will be the one. Fingers crossed! 

Do you have any healthier food suggestions you would like to share? Maybe a product you couldn’t live without on your fit journey? I would love to know! 

Ebb & Flow

Do I even have readers anymore? I mean, really. My blogging has been absent and erratic as of late. Trying to juggle this mom life, fit life, and blog life has been difficult. I can tell you the blogging and fitness has fallen wayside. Long story short, I’ve been trying to keep myself sane and be a decent mother. It leaves me exhausted at the end of the day. I’m still struggling with the PPA and PPD. I’m always on edge; but handle it better on some days than others. I do find I am better able to cope when I can fit some sort of exercise within the day. I read an article that if you struggle with anxiety that you should cut caffeine out of your diet. UH, do you mean coffee? Do you want me to go postal?! As SP has been saying lately, “No way, Jose!” Hubby will attest that I am not a nice person until I’ve had a few sip of coffee. I cannot function without coffee. (You can blame my grandmother on that one. As a toddler, she would put a splash of coffee in my milk. I always remember my grandmother with a cup of coffee in her hand and I wanted to be just like her. FYI, my grandparents spoiled me rotten.) I’ve been going back and forth to my grandmother’s here recently. The woman drinks 3-4 POTS of coffee a day! I limit myself to 3 cups a day. Anyway, that is one solution to reducing my anxiety that I will not follow. 

Last Wednesday, I didn’t blog because I had an appointment with a new therapist. I quit seeing the previous one because: 1) Her schedule was extremely limited. She booked up two months in advance and then cancel your appointment. I felt like I was waiting all the time to see her. 2) When I would see her, I felt like she hadn’t been listening at all. I was always having to re-explain things to her. Things that I felt she should have reviewed before we met. 3) She never offered coping suggestions. I left feeling just as hopeless as before I came. So, I took a therapy break to look for someone else. Wednesday night, I met with a new therapist. Because it was our first meeting, she had “get to know me” questions, which resulted in her asking more questions, and before we knew it, it was two hours later. To say that I was mentally and emotionally exhausted was an understatement. I couldn’t wait to go to bed. I did enjoy our meeting though. We set up short term goals to accomplish and she commented on giving me homework to do. PPD, and depression in general, is hard to live with. You don’t want to feel this way. You wish you could “just snap out of it”. But that’s not how it works. I follow several postpartum support groups on Facebook. I continued to see posts about PPA and PPD and women suggesting to watch the documentary on Netflix called When The Bough Breaks. Y’all, that documentary hit me hard. It made me realize how severe my first few months were, how much I really needed help during those times…and there wasn’t help to be found. Actually, it made me realize how strong I am; because I thought hard about ending the pain. I watched the documentary in hopes to find more information on resources to help my PPD. Instead, I found a way to help my husband understand what I’ve been going through. So, if you know someone who is struggling with PPA/PPD and want to understand what they are going through, watch When The Bough Breaks. It will open your eyes to the internal turmoil someone with PPA/PPD goes through. 

I try to focus on one day at a time. Some days are overwhelming and I struggle to cope. Like last week, when I realized I had forgotten LB’s PKU formula in the warmer at the house and we were already 30 minutes away at gymnsatics. I was so upset. It took everything I had not to be a total emotional mess in front of everyone. The entire hour, I couldn’t concentrate on SP’s gymnastic practice because I was thinking of all the consequences my failure could cause. Surprise, he lived! He not only drank that formula, but ate his 6pm meal, and final nighttime bottle without issue. I have to keep in mind, mistakes happen. Plus, when I’m not taking care of myself mentally; these type of mistake happen more frequent. Then there are other days when I do find that joyful spark in motherhood. Like when LB gets so tickled at his sister snorting like a pig, when I look over at them and they are snuggled together, holding hands, or like today as I dropped off SP at her Jr. Engineer Train camp, she gives LB and I big hugs and kisses and tells us  she loves us before she heads into the classroom. Those are the moments I find joy and peace in. 

I don’t know what God’s plans are for us. I still don’t understand why God chose for LB to have PKU. I can’t even imagine what good will come of it; but I have to keep faith that there will be good from it. 

Next week I will have some healthy supper ideas for you. That is one thing I’ve been up too. Cooking healthy meals again and eating less takeout. 

Back In Bama

Hello? You still there? I’ve really neglected this blog. And I feel terrible about it. 

I also feel like I’ve been on a non-stop roller coaster. I thought things would calm down after SP’s 4th birthday and the end of the school programs; but it hasn’t. Over Mother’s Day weekend, we had to travel to Atlanta for our son’s PKU appointment with his nutritionist. To be open and honest…it was emotionally difficult for me. Hubby tried to make the weekend special for me; but my dark cloud of depression loomed over. Every time I have to return to Atlanta for his appointments, I have a hard time. On the drive up there I remember being so scared and worried for my 5 day old boy. Once we arrived, exhausted from worry and crying, they dumped tons of medical procedures, jargon, and “what ifs” about treatment for him. It was like an out-of-body experience. I just sat there stunned and watched the whirlwind of people around me enter and leave the room. There was no sympathy or understanding as to why I was crying. So, returning to the clinic every three months is difficult. Hubby did grab takeout from The Cheesecake Factory. Who doesn’t like Cheesecake Factory?! Unfortunately that night SP had an upset stomach from the antibiotic she was taking. The Friday before we left I had to take her to the pediatrician for her yearly sinus crud and an ear infection. Oh, the joys of living in Savannah. All of our allergies are messed up. We slept for maybe 4 hours in total. I came back home exhausted. Gymnastics, wellness check ups, and such has kept me busy during the week too. Since I’m a glutton for punishment, I said “What the heck, let’s make this even more stressful! I’m going to Alabama for Memorial Day weekend!” 

That’s what I did. I left Savannah at 8 AM with the two kiddos. We drove through 3 patches of rough weather and finally made it to my Grandmother’s house. I’m going to take the kids to Auburn, do some neighborhood scouting, self tour the University, update my fan gear, and eat at Toomer’s Corner…all before nap time. Wish me luck! My poor husband has been left to care for himself. I hope he makes it.

I will be better at posting on here though!

Super exciting news for my midwifery followers: Our voices were heard! HB 315 passed with HB 316 as an amendment last the last possible minute. Governor Ivey signed the bill today. Alabama is the 33rd state to legalize CPMs. Not only that, there will be a midwifery regulation board set up too. Midwives are free in Alabama! Unfortunately, 1/3rd of Alabama women will not qualify to use a CPM with the amendment that excludes VBACs (Vaginal Birth After Cesarean). My heart pours out to these women, many of them wanting to use a midwife due to the trauma sustained during the c-section. However, it is nice to see some progression within the state.