Comfort Zones

Isn’t it odd how people like to stay within their comfort zones, even if the zone isn’t perceived as satisfying? Why is that?

I know for me, it is fear of failure & being judged for that failure.

In a previous post, I talked about my struggles as a SAHM and the desire of a career. Yet, I stay a SAHM because it is comfortable for me and my family.

However, I know it is because I fear of failing. I would be asking a lot from my family!

I would have to go back to school. It’s been 6 years. There isn’t a close by Master’s program offered, so it would have to be online. Which there are a number of “degree mills” to watch out for. I need to study for the GRE. Been there, that was overwhelming. The admissions process to one considerable program requires 3 academic references. Uh, again, it’s been 6 years. I doubt I will be remembered.

All of these “ifs” grip me with fear. Fear of letting my family down, after so much sacrifice. Of course, if I stay a SAHM the only sacrifice is my dream of a career. And that is comfortable to me. Am I happy? Most days, although I always feel that longing to be more. Would I be happier working towards my dream? I’m not sure. That places me outside of my comfort zone.

Am I willing to step out of my comfort zone and face failure?

Or stay comfortable and give up a dream.

Do you or have you allowed fear to keep you in an unsatisfied comfort zone?

*Disclaimer: Please do not take this as I am ungrateful to be a SAHM. I am extremely grateful. I have so many irreplaceable memories with my daughter that many parents miss. I’ve watched and helped with all of those adorable baby firsts. Now, I am watching her little mind expand with new knowledge. A mesmerizing process. But I struggle with the idea that I am selfish for wanting more for myself, with the fear that I may be failing her as a mother for having these struggles. I write these posts because I know I am not the only one struggling.

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2 thoughts on “Comfort Zones

  1. I’m a SAHW and I feel you. For so long I was caught up in paying our bills, food planning, and such that I felt if I got a job is be letting my family down (my husband and I) but we started talking and I’m in college now heading for my career. I didn’t hit the same bumps as you but personally I think this choice is best for more than just my sense of worth and joy but also I can make a bigger change in the world and it’ll benefit my husband and children (when they come)

    Like

    • I did my time as a SAHW too. I couldn’t find a job with my BA degree, unless it was at a fast food or retail place. I felt like I deserved more than minimum wage, after working hard for a degree. I worked really hard at home, keeping the house clean and organized. I still felt as though I wasn’t doing enough for my husband. Society tells us to go to college and become a professional; however, that doesn’t make it appropriate for everyone’s situation. It just makes that person feel inadequate while doing a non-traditional job. I know for me, I struggle with knowing if any thing did happen to my husband; I would be struggling to find a job that supported my child and I. That is why I would encourage furthering your education.

      Liked by 1 person

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